Things I Tell My 4 Year Old that Nurses Tell Our Patients

-Put your underwear on!


- If you are not going to wear clothes you are going to have to stay in your room. Nobody wants to see you naked.


- Stop playing with your penis in public.


- Don't use your sleeve as a tissue. That's what Kleenex is made for.


- You need a shower/bath. .... No you are not clean. You stink. And it does not count if you do not use soap. I know if you haven't used soap so do not try to sneak.


- Dinner is here. WASH YOUR HANDS before coming to dinner. I don't know where those hands have been but I know it is somewhere pretty disgusting.


- If you are going to yell like that you are going to need to take a time out in your room. (NB: 4 year old's who refuse get privileges revoked. Some patients get prn medications if they get really bad so there is some difference here.)



- Pull those pants up. Your underwear is showing. (Of course the 4 year old's reason for droopy drawers is the more benign thin body build while the adult/adolescent patient is just trying to play the "gangsta" role.)


- Stop picking your nose/butt at the dinner table.


- No biting!


- Watch your language!

-When was the last time you took a brush to that hair?

-You need to brush your teeth. Your breath is disgusting.